I loathe this very situation

No more I want to change from the girl I used to be

It’s not me,,

I am lost somewhere in the crowd

Lost in this grumpier world

This filthy world of hatred and provoking outrage…

Damn, blind I have become

Beholding the bitter truth and admiring this cruel world I am..

But I tell to myself, that everything is not going to be okay

That there is no reason for all these pain that I  now am suffering from

The time it took to change, the time it took to see all these mistakes

The life I had, I can’t have it back

The choices I made of course affected me in all those ways.

The mistakes I committed have not been forgotten

But have been recorded somewhere…

The tears I shed, the sounds I made

 The feelings that left me feeling in a different way

Yet I can’t see why these tears feel so unreal

I am not the same, my words are unsaid

What I hide is buried deep inside within me…

It hurts so much to know that I‘ll never be the girl that I used to be

The one that would always laugh

The one that you knew would always be strong

The feeling is real, the truth is sealed

I cry in the dark cause I know I cut too deep...

The harder I try to get rid out of this rotten world, the weaker I become

It's dragging me and making my life more melancholic!!